Hope Springs Eternal

This priceless post is from the mind of Joel Gross here. How he eats with his tongue so firmly entrenched in his cheek, I know not.

11. SERIOUS DISEASE PROVISION: The PRENUPTIAL AGREEMENT most definitely is not “in sickness or health”- if said CHICK becomes ill (cancer, broken leg, common cold), automatic divorce proceedings begin.

What is wrong with this picture?

SUNDAY, OCTOBER 25, 2009

Boudreaux & Thibodaux – Cajun Prenup

Thank my daddy for sending this one!~~~

@@@

Boudreaux done got old and his children done parked him at one’a dem old folks’ homes near Breaux Bridge. At Shady Acres, Boo meets him a lovely lady from Texas, and bein’ a fine upstanding Catlick, him didn’t wanna do nuttin’ against his religion. Derefore (Therefore), ol’ Mr. Boudreaux axed (asked) for her hand trew (through) a proper marriage proposal.

Now, Boudreaux and Mabel were in dere (their) 80s. Mabel tells everyone at Shady Acres the good news. Miss Claudine, Mabel’s best friend, tells Mabel since she’s so wealthy, and da person she was about to jump da broom wit (Cajun wedding tradition) isn’t worth a plug nickel, she should git (get) her a prenuptial agreement, yeah.

Mabel’s swingin’ on da porch swing wit Boo, and she tells him she’ll jump da broom wit him if he’ll sign a prenup.

Boudreaux, him say to his lady love and betrothed, “I don’ know what dat is, but I’ll sign anyting you want, ’cause I love you dat much and more!”

Mabel, gets out her pen and paper to get started. She reads out to Boudreaux, “I want to keep my house down in Texas with all the oil wells.”

Boo says, “Dat’s fine wit me. I’ll keep my shack on da bayou.”

“I want to keep my Cadillac, BMW and Lexus.” Mabel holds Boo’s hand in case he’s getting worried or put off.

Boo smiles, squeezes her hand and says, “Dat’s fine wit me. I’ll keep my pick-em-up truck.”

“I want to keep my yacht that’s moored near my summer home in Padre Island…”

“Okay, dat’s fine wit me. I got my pirough.”

“Okay, Mr. Boo, I want to keep all my jewelry too.”

“Dat’s fine wit me. I’ll keep my stuffed deer head.”

“Thank you, honey. Now, one more thing; I wanna have sex six times a week!”

“Hey, Mabel, dat’s fine wit me too, yeah! Put me down for Fridays, sha (cher).”

*Photo posted first here.

POSTED BY ANGIE LEDBETTER AT 5:00 AM

LABELS: BOUDREAUX AND THIBODAUX JOKE

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1. JK Wedding Entrance (and Exit Divorce) Dance Viral Videos
2. Are Divorce Cakes a Half Baked Idea?
3. Solomon’s Dilemma: How do we Split the Babies?

One of the premier family law bloggers, Michael Sherman, wrote an excellent article several months ago discussing this very issue.  He analyzed the different styles that family law attorneys utilize in representing their clients, particularly what he classifies as “the lamb, the pit bull and the fox.” Michael absolutely nailed this issue, and I couldn’t agree more with his assessment of this issue.  His observations of these personas are listed below:

Lamb Lawyer

The lamb is the lawyer that just sort of goes with the flow.  They are reactive, not proactive.  They want to avoid confrontation at all costs and that means they also want to avoid going to court at all costs, even if it means convincing their clients to settle for significantly worse terms than they should.  The lamb may even be afraid to try the divorce case. He will rarely, if ever, tell his client that he should not sign a settlement offer that is being extended from the other side even if that offer is clearly inequitable.  Thankfully, there are not a lot of lambs that last very long as divorce lawyers.

Much more prevalent is the pit bull, who is exactly the opposite.  They hate to settle cases.  In fact, some of them won’t do anything proactive to try to settle their divorce cases.  It is almost as if they take some type of perverse joy in seeing the “blood running in the streets.”

Pit Bull Lawyer

The truth is that often they do this simply to develop and maintain a reputation as “Bad Leroy Brown…baddest man in the whole damn town.”  When a spouse is angry and in the emotional stage of wanting to exact revenge, they want to be the name on everyone’s lips when that aggrieved spouse asks their neighbor who is the meanest SOB in town.  And, so they work hard to maintain that reputation because it makes them a lot of money.

The sad part is that acting like a pit bull is rarely, if ever, in their own client’s best interests.  Of course, the pit bull’s main concern is not their client. If you know anything about pit bulls, you will know that they are very aggressive and vicious. But, they are not thinking animals.  They act only on instinct.  When they fight, they not only destroy the dog they are fighting, but by their own actions hurt themselves and anything else around them (which often includes their own client’s and their client’s children).  The pit bull is aggressive for the sake of being aggressive, not for any long-term benefit it brings their client.  Often people going through divorce will think they need an aggressive lawyer to represent them in their divorce.  They are wrong.  What they need is a lawyer who is assertive.  There is a difference.  It is the difference between the pit bull and the fox.

Wily Fox Lawyer

The fox is wise and cunning.  He sees the big picture.  The fox is assertive when he needs to be, compromising when it benefits his clients’ long-term best interests, and always aware of the many different consequences his actions have on his clients.  He stands on principle. Yet, he is a strong advocate for his client when it promotes his client’s long-term best interests.  He recognizes that reaching a fair settlement is always preferable to trying the case and leaving it up to the judge.  Yet, he also knows that if a fair settlement is not forthcoming, then he must be willing and able to prepare to effectively litigate the case in court.

When choosing a divorce lawyer, you should avoid the lamb and the pit bull at all costs!  Instead, find yourself a fox.

Source:  ”The Style of Your Divoce Lawyer: The Lamb, the Pit Bull, and the Fox“ by Michael Sherman, published at his Alabama Family Law Blog and J. Benjamin Stevens

Related posts:

1. I am No Longer a Family Law Lawyer – I am a Divorce Lawyer, A Custody Lawyer, An Adoption Lawyer, etc., etc., etc.
2. A Plea to Parents from a Divorce Lawyer: Leave Your Kids Out of It!
3. Maryland Online Child Support Calculator

This online application program will assist you in completing a Child Support Worksheet. This worksheet estimates the child support obligation that a court may order a parent to pay toward support of the child(ren) on a monthly basis. Under Maryland law, there is a rebuttable presumption that the amount of child support, which would result from the use of these guidelines, is the correct amount of support to be awarded; however, a court may choose to deviate from the guidelines under certain circumstances.

Related posts:

1. Don’t Pay Your Child Support? Then the Po-Po be Knocking at your Door
2. Divorce in Maryland – Generally
3. Paternity in Maryland: Who’s Your Momma?

Evil Eye

It is terrifying for a victim of domestic violence to step outside the vicious cycle their life has become and file the legal documents necessary for a temporary protective order in a court of law.  But studies have shown – and common sense dictates – that the prospect for the victim to present their case while the abuser is virtually standing next to them is unthinkable.  Surely it has given many pause in coming forward.  Bravo to the Montgomery County Family Justice Center and Foundation…may they lead the way across the country with this very significant step.

(ROCKVILLE, Md. — Sept. 28, 2009) Victims of domestic violence who come to the Montgomery County Family Justice Center (here is a great article about the Center) now have safer, easier access to justice. Thanks to a pilot program launched by the Maryland Judiciary, they can now file requests for temporary protective orders directly from the Family Justice Center and have their requests heard by judges at the Montgomery County Circuit or District Court by way of a live video link.

Video conferencing will be provided for temporary protective orders in Montgomery County courts that are ex parte — without notice to or the presence of the other party.

“The Judiciary is offering video conferencing as a way to help protect victims of domestic violence and improve access to and safety in our courthouses for all Marylanders,” said Chief Judge Ben C. Clyburn of the District Court of Maryland. “Victims no longer will have to leave the safety and security of the Family Justice Center to file petitions for protection. This will benefit victims, families and the general public we serve.”

The Montgomery County Family Justice Center opened this past spring in Rockville. Staff from the Montgomery County Sheriff’s Office, Office of State’s Attorney, Department of Health and Human Services, Montgomery County Police, House of Ruth and other private non-profits work together to provide services for domestic violence victims at the center, including help filing temporary protective orders. Protective orders generally apply to people in domestic relationships, and are issued by judges when petitioners have proved one of the following has occurred: an act that caused serious bodily harm or has placed the petitioner in fear of imminent bodily harm; an assault; rape or sexual offense; false imprisonment; or criminal stalking.

Last year, Montgomery County courts granted more than 1,850 temporary protective orders; statewide, more than 18,400 temporary protective orders were granted in Maryland’s courts.

“In addition to easier access to our courts, video conferencing reduces the danger to the victim of encountering the offender at or near the courthouse,” Judge Clyburn said. “This plan also provides more flexibility in scheduling temporary protective order cases, which is a more effective use of court time.” While they are waiting for their video hearing, victims can also receive other critical services at the Family Justice Center.

Video conferencing, which is operating as a pilot program at the Montgomery County courts, was developed in consultation with court officials, District and Circuit Court judges, the Clerk of the Circuit Court, court staff, Montgomery County government, members of the bar, other interested parties, vendors, and providers of video conferencing systems. Private funding for the equipment for this program was provided through a grant from the Verizon Wireless Hopeline Foundation.

The Montgomery County Family Justice Center also has a special room where children can play under the watch of trained volunteers. “Court buildings are not an ideal place for children, and video conferencing has an added benefit of helping to ease the stress on children, as well as reducing the disruption that is often caused by children in the courthouse or courtroom,” said Pam Harris, court administrator for the Montgomery County Circuit Court.

Family Justice Centers are fast becoming an accepted trend as they provide services for domestic violence victims at one location, enhancing their personal safety by reducing the number of places a victim has to go to receive services and minimizing barriers to services victims may face. These barriers include lack of transportation, child care, cultural issues, and language.

“Statistics have shown that the most vulnerable time for domestic violence victims is immediately following the issuance of a temporary protective order,” said Chief Deputy Darren Popkin of the Montgomery County Sheriff’s Office. “Nationwide, jurisdictions that have opened Family Justice Centers have shown a dramatic reduction in domestic related homicides among the victims that have sought services at the centers. By co-locating services, critical safety services can be coordinated by partners at the center.”

About three-quarters of people coming to Family Justice Centers throughout the United States ask for help with filing for a temporary protective order. The Judiciary has acted to improve access to services by including attorneys and advocates for domestic violence victims in courthouses across the state.

# # # # #

(Editor’s Note: For more information, contact the Maryland Judiciary Office of Communications and Public Affairs, (410) 260-1488.

Related posts:

1. Domestic Violence: Legal Steps in Obtaining a Maryland Protective Order
2. Domestic Violence Billboards: Idea! – Maryland Insurance Companies Should Sponsor
3. Domestic Violence: Facing Abuse

Our country is in moral decay.  Hand in hand with the prevalence of greed, strolls incivility.   La te da. The last few days are prime examples of the many despicable public displays – Serena Williams, Kanye West, and Congressman Wilson.  Unfortunately, in my own profession there is an alarming increase in bad behavior amongst attorneys.  Don’t laugh – it wasn’t always that way…  Many of us were taught that one did not have to be disagreeable to disagree.  But that is a conversation for another day.

However, when one connects the dots of just these two sad realities – greed and incivility – the picture becomes clear – the raging narcissists and insidious sociopaths are running the asylum.  We are in a fight for the very soul of civilization.

The strength of our republic lies in the middle class.  Who else is there….but just us? (Pun intended.)  It is past the time for action.

I digress.  More on that later.  Back to the main story.  In the articles below, note the identity of the eight companies Rep. Charles Schumer found in 1995 that refused to write health, life or disability policies for women who have been abused.  Perhaps a call to your insurance agent or the insurance commissioner of your state would at least serve to let them know we have not been lulled us into complacency; they have not dumbed us down and good and decent people do outnumber the raging lunatics attracting the media attention.  Here are the 2007 insurance company executive salaries, should you need any incentive:

ANNUAL COMPENSATION 2007:

* Ronald A. Williams, Chair/ CEO, Aetna Inc., $23,045,834
* H. Edward Hanway, Chair/ CEO, Cigna Corp, $30.16 million
* David B. Snow, Jr, Chair/ CEO, Medco Health, $21.76 million
* Michael B. MCallister, CEO, Humana Inc, $20.06 million
* Stephen J. Hemsley, CEO, UnitedHealth Group, $13,164,529
* Angela F. Braly, President/ CEO, Wellpoint, $9,094,771
* Dale B. Wolf, CEO, Coventry Health Care, $20.86 million
* Jay M. Gellert, President/ CEO, Health Net, $16.65 million
* William C. Van Faasen, Chairman, Blue Cross Blue Shield of Mass., $3 million plus $16.4 million in retirement benefits
* Charlie Baker, President/ CEO, Harvard Pilgrim Health Care, $1.5 million
* James Roosevelt, Jr., CEO, Tufts Associated Health Plans, $1.3 million
* Cleve L. Killingsworth, President/CEO Blue Cross Blue Shield of Massachusetts, $3.6 million
* Raymond McCaskey, CEO, Health Care Service Corp (Blue Cross Blue Shield), $10.3 million
* Daniel P. McCartney, CEO, Healthcare Services Group, Inc, $1,061,513
* Daniel Loepp, CEO, Blue Cross Blue Shield of Michigan, $1,657,555
* Todd S. Farha, CEO, WellCare Health Plans, $5,270,825
* Michael F. Neidorff, CEO, Centene Corp, $8,750,751

With that, the Young Turks:

The Service Employees International Union “SEIU” initially reported on this story.  They have organized a call to action.  Please heed the call.

Words cannot describe the sheer inhumanity of this claim. It serves as yet further proof that our insurance system is broken, destroyed by the profit-mongering of the very companies whose sole purpose should be to provide Americans with access to care when they need it most. In 1994, an informal survey conducted by the Subcommittee on Crime and Criminal Justice of the United States Senate Judiciary Committee revealed that 8 of the 16 largest insurers in the country used domestic violence as a factor when deciding whether to extend coverage and how much to charge if coverage was extended.

It is clear that insurance companies refuse to police themselves. It’s up to us to call on Congress to take action now to pass health care reform and end discrimination against patients with pre-existing conditions.

Ryan Grim of the Huffington Post writes:

With the White House zeroing in on the insurance-industry practice of discriminating against clients based on pre-existing conditions, administration allies are calling attention to how broadly insurers interpret the term to maximize profits.

How many tears must we shed?

It turns out that in eight states, plus the District of Columbia, getting beaten up by your spouse is a pre-existing condition.

Under the cold logic of the insurance industry, it makes perfect sense: If you are in a marriage with someone who has beaten you in the past, you’re more likely to get beaten again than the average person and are therefore more expensive to insure.

In human terms, it’s a second punishment for a victim of domestic violence.

In 2006, Democrats tried to end the practice. An amendment introduced by Sen. Patty Murray (D-Wash.), now a member of leadership, split the Health Education Labor & Pensions Committee 10-10. The tie meant that the measure failed.

All ten no votes were Republicans, including Sen. Mike Enzi (R-Wyoming), a member of the “Gang of Six” on the Finance Committee who are hashing out a bipartisan bill. A spokesman for Enzi didn’t immediately return a call from Huffington Post.

At the time, Enzi defended his vote by saying that such regulations could increase the price of insurance and make it out of reach for more people. “If you have no insurance, it doesn’t matter what services are mandated by the state,” he said, according to a CQ Today item from March 15th, 2006.

Robert Zirkelbach, a spokesman for an insurance industry trade group, America’s Health Insurance Plans (AHIP), said that the National Association of Insurance Commissioners (NAIC) has proposed ending the discrimination. “The NAIC has a model on this that we strongly supported. That model bans the use of a person’s status as a victim of domestic violence in making a decision on coverage,” he said.

During the last health care reform push, in 1993 and 1994, the industry similarly promised to end discrimination against people with pre-existing conditions.

Murray pushed to include the domestic violence concern in this year’s comprehensive health care bill. “Senator Murray continues to believe that victims of domestic violence should not be punished for the crimes of their abusers. That is why she worked to include language in the Senate HELP Committee’s health insurance reform bill that would ban this discriminatory and harmful insurance company practice,” said spokesman Eli Zupnick.

In 1994, then-Rep. Charles Schumer (D-N.Y.), now a member of Senate leadership, had his staff survey 16 insurance companies. He found that eight would not write health, life or disability policies for women who have been abused. In 1995, the Boston Globe found that Nationwide, Allstate, State Farm, Aetna, Metropolitan Life, The Equitable Companies, First Colony Life, The Prudential and the Principal Financial Group had all either canceled or denied coverage to women who’d been beaten.

The Service Employees International Union asked members to write letters to Congress regarding the exclusion and have quickly generated hundreds, says an SEIU spokeswoman.

The relevant provision:

SEC. 2706. PROHIBITING DISCRIMINATION AGAINST INDIVIDUAL PARTICIPANTS AND BENEFICIARIES BASED ON HEALTH STATUS.

(a) IN GENERAL.–A group health plan and a health insurance issuer offering group or individual health insurance coverage may not establish rules for eligibility (including continued eligibility) of any individual to enroll under the terms of the plan or coverage based on any of the following health status-related factors in relation to the individual or a dependent of the individual:

(1) Health status.

(2) Medical condition (including both physical and mental illnesses)

(3) Claims experience.

(4) Receipt of health care.

(5) Medical history.

(6) Genetic information.

(7) Evidence of insurability (including conditions arising out of acts of domestic violence).

(8) Disability.

(9) Any other health status-related factor determined appropriate by the Secretary.

UPDATE: The eight states that still allow it are Idaho, Mississippi, North Carolina, North Dakota, Oklahoma, South Carolina, South Dakota and Wyoming, according to a report by the National Women’s Law Center.

When you gonna wake up, when you gonna wake up
When you gonna wake up and strengthen the things that remain?

Ryan Grim of the Huffington Post.

In 1979, Bob Dylan wrote this song and it is as true today as it was relevant then:

Bob Dylan

When You Gonna Wake Up?

God don’t make no promises that He don’t keep.
You got some big dreams, baby, but in order to dream you gotta still be asleep.

When you gonna wake up, when you gonna wake up
When you gonna wake up and strengthen the things that remain?

Counterfeit philosophies have polluted all of your thoughts.
Karl Marx has got ya by the throat, Henry Kissinger’s got you tied up in knots.

When you gonna wake up, when you gonna wake up
When you gonna wake up and strengthen the things that remain?

You got innocent men in jail, your insane asylums are filled,
You got unrighteous doctors dealing drugs that’ll never cure your ills.

When you gonna wake up, when you gonna wake up
When you gonna wake up and strengthen the things that remain?

You got men who can’t hold their peace and women who can’t control their tongues,
The rich seduce the poor and the old are seduced by the young.

When you gonna wake up, when you gonna wake up
When you gonna wake up and strengthen the things that remain?

Adulterers in churches and pornography in the schools,
You got gangsters in power and lawbreakers making rules.

When you gonna wake up, when you gonna wake up
When you gonna wake up and strengthen the things that remain?

Spiritual advisors and gurus to guide your every move,
Instant inner peace and every step you take has got to be approved.

When you gonna wake up, when you gonna wake up
When you gonna wake up and strengthen the things that remain?

Do you ever wonder just what God requires?
You think He’s just an errand boy to satisfy your wandering desires.

When you gonna wake up, when you gonna wake up
When you gonna wake up and strengthen the things that remain?

You can’t take it with you and you know that it’s too worthless to be sold,
They tell you, “Time is money” as if your life was worth its weight in gold.

When you gonna wake up, when you gonna wake up
When you gonna wake up and strengthen the things that remain?

There’s a Man up on a cross and He’s been crucified.
Do you have any idea why or for who He died?

Copyright © 1979 Special Rider Music

UPDATE from SEIU:

In eight states, it is legal for insurance companies to deny coverage to victims of domestic violence, classifying it as a “pre-existing condition.”

This week, the U.S. House Subcommittee on Domestic Policy is conducting hearings examining insurance company interference with patient-doctor decisions. We’re asking the Subcommittee Chairman Rep. Dennis Kucinich to question the insurance industry on whether they’ve denied claims based on domestic violence in the past, and to pledge to never discriminate against victims of domestic violence.

Tell Rep. Kucinich: Demand Answers from the Insurance Industry on Claiming Domestic Violence as a “Pre-Existing Condition”

No one should be denied health care coverage, least of all, people who have already endured so much.

Urge Rep. Kucinich to publicly question insurance companies on this practice during his hearings on Sept. 16th & 17th. Go here to participate.

Related posts:

1. Domestic Violence Billboards: Idea! – Maryland Insurance Companies Should Sponsor
2. Temporary Protective Orders to be Heard via Video in Montgomery County
3. Domestic Violence is Real